ELMO'S WORLD!?!

I don't want to be seen as the old scullery maid, Patmore, in DOWNTON ABBEY who can not master the new “mixer-beater.” (1) Like Patmore I have issues with new technology. It scares me. I once was deluded into thinking that I could sew. I bought the latest sewing machine with programmable features for buttonholes, fancy stitches, etc. It did not take long for me to destroy the new machine and to realize that it was more than I could handle. It actually frightened me.

I still don't own a cellphone. I know that is shocking. I appreciate cellphones. Cellphones are some times lifesavers in emergencies. There are even occasions when I use cellphones. I love OnStar in my car. Plus, my oldest granddaughter tells me there is an app for cellphones to convert my voice messages into text messages----great for old folks with arthritis in their fingers!!!

So why don't I like cellphones? I believe that cellphones have helped foster some very bad habits, poor manners, and hardships. There have been times when cellphones have been the bane of my existence. For example, since it was my responsibility to make payroll at school every month, I always felt like telling the parent who was delinquent with their child's tuition that “blue-tooth” was not a necessity.

I think that cellphones can bring out some of our worst qualities. My feelings against cellphones initially started as an employer. I employed people to care for and supervise children, not to talk or to text on their cellphones. No matter how many rules were written into the personnel policy about cellphone usage, there was always someone breaking the rules. Unapproved or unauthorized cellphone usage during working hours is like stealing from your employer. It may seem like paperclips in the workplace, but when your job is to supervise children then it can be costly and dangerous!

People are selfish with cellphones. Last week I was in a club meeting that was featuring a guest speaker. During the presentation, the cellphone of the woman in front of me rang (apparently she didn't get the memo about turning off cellphones during meetings). The woman answered her cellphone and proceeded to have a conversation (apparently she didn't get the memo about excusing herself and leaving the room either).

As a teacher, I have seen parenting practices change because of cellphones. Clearly it is easier to contact parents when children get sick at school. However, it is harder to get the attention of parents before or after school. Parents now come to drop off or to pick up their children while engaging in conversations on their cellphones.

And because of cellphones we are all living in ELMO'S WORLD. What part of “selfie” (declared 2013 “word of the year” by OED) does not indicate narcissism. (It was suggested on Fo' Drizzle.com back in 2012 that the Sesame Street puppet, Elmo, optimized Narcissistic Personality Disorder.) Now everyone with cameras in their cellphones can mimic Elmo by taking pictures of themselves and posting the photos on the internet. Like Elmo, these folks believe that the world is all about them.

Teens, in particular, are susceptible to the lure of cellphones. Like previous generations, teens want to keep in touch with their friends. However, teens, as they struggle to establish their feelings about themselves, are taking “selfies” to a new level. It has been suggested that teens use “selfies” as a form of “dress-up.”(2) Teens can download apps so that they can perform “selfie surgery!?!”

Now as if “selfie” wasn't bad enough, we have “healthie” to look forward to. According to the the April, 2014 edition of SELF Magazine “healthie” is a healthy “selfie.” People will be posting pictures of themselves as they workout. I hope they don't create an app which lets us smell a “healthie!?!”

1. “Downtonomics: Troubles echo in the modern world “ by Steven Mufson of The Washington Post, STARNEWS, Sunday, February 9, 2014
2. “Common Sense about Selfies” by Carolyn Jabs, www.growing-up-online.com, WILMINGTON PARENT, March, 2014